Rachel Moore

Composed, dignified, empathetic and diligent, the Princess of Wales told a group of girls this week how she had to learn to be royal, and was still learning.

Catherine explained how she had worked hard to fit into the institution. Her words echoed those of Duchess of Edinburgh, who married into the world’s best-known family 12 years before her.

The women, born 17 years apart, shared similar backgrounds.

Sophie Rhys-Jones came from Kent where her mother worked as a secretary and her father a tyre salesman.

Catherine Middleton’s parents, Carole and Michael, ran Party Pieces Holdings from 1987, which yesterday as it fell into administration.

Carole was previously airline cabin crew.

Catherine and Sophie strove, as expected by the ‘Firm’, to conform royal ways; to be like the others. 

Years on, both still stand out from the royal crowd for their qualities, demeanour, work ethic, authenticity and impeccable conduct. 

Watching both women closely for years, it’s crystal clear that, rather than expecting them to learn from the royals how to behave in a manner fitting for the royal family, the royals could have learned much from them.

The normality, relatability and warmth these women have brought to the staid, stuffy and stiff royal affairs have proved immeasurably valuable, and may well turn out to be the Firm’s saving grace.

Like, Catherine, The Duchess of Edinburgh – we’re still struggling with these new titles – has that rare knack of putting people at ease, whoever they are, and really engages with people.

While they make mixing with the crowds look a breeze, like the previous Princess of Wales, the royals by birth always seem awkward, like they’re not really listening and wish they were somewhere else.

Only last week on a walkabout, the Princess of Wales knelt to hug a girl who was overwhelmed in front of her. Wit her trainers, jeans, dealing with little Louis’ fidgety outbursts and doing the school run, she lacks the royal stiffness and aloofness but looks every inch a queen-in-waiting.

They weren’t brought up as royals and it shows. They are grounded and have lived normal lives, out of the limelight and without huge privilege.

They didn’t have the nannies, long absences from parents, the staff and were brought up in close family units. It’s been said that the Prince of Wales found comfort within the Middleton family environment.

Catherine, like Sophie, isn’t afraid to get in there and talk openly and listen.  The girls in Bath this week told her about their challenges – teenage issues, bullying and pressures of social media. 

They both have star quality and their own style. At the coronation, a photographer captured the Princess of Wales looking over her shoulder into the camera as she entered Westminster Abbey. She was queen the country is waiting for. 

Although not royal by blood – whatever that might mean – she’s more regal than most.

William and has said he will do his coronation very differently to his father’s. We can then expect the full modernisation, leaving the mystical anachronisms in the past where they belong.

He will be guided by his wife about what will land well with the nation. Her, and Sophie, seem to grasp, unlike other royals, that for respect and popularity, it is crucial for monarchy to be relevant, reflect and be in tune with the society they exist in.

Both women work hard to be in tune.

It feels almost that King Charles and Queen Camilla are interims – a kind of holding and pay lip-service monarchy - waiting for the big event.

Catherine has Sophie, well known for her polite but straight talking and loyalty, to lean on for the wisdom of experience.

She now as a more public-facing role and has the experience of a few embarrassing episodes that she’s had to navigate she has learned from.

Sophie, who has never sought the limelight, had a special bond with the Queen, calling her “mama.” She is supposed to get on well with the late Prince Philip, was not fazed by his abruptness and would stand up to him.

She is patron of more than 70 organisations and one of the hardest-working members of the Royal Family. Her charity work focuses mainly on preventable blindness and the issue of sexual violence in war.

She got on very well with Philip. She knew how to handle him. She made him laugh and was not fazed by his abruptness. She would not let him bully her.

As the monarchy moves into a very different era, with its popularity waning after the death of the Queen. 

These two women from middle class working families could be seen to be holding the future of the royal family in their hands. 

So far, they’re not setting a foot wrong in building popularity.

 

Thanks for the lovely card

Since writing the loss of my wonderful dog, Leo, I’ve been overwhelmed by people’s kindness and empathy.

I’d particularly like to thank EDP reader Maureen Elmer for sending a card with beautifully chosen words in the most exquisite handwriting.

In an age of emails, texts and social media, it meant so much that someone took the time and trouble to choose, write and send a card.

Maureen, we’ve never met but are now connected by your kindness and love of dogs.

Your card takes pride of place by Leo’s picture.